Weekend Retreat

Offered just once per year.
Spend a weekend at Pastime Farm.
Commuters are welcome to participate.

This small group retreat offers some of the most powerful teachings of Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT) over the course of a weekend. Intentionally relaxed and spacious, retreat allows for whatever emerges spontaneously among the group. Our aim is to directly experience the concepts introduced in the prerequisite course. Teaching periods are interspersed amongst plenty of free time. This spacious agenda allows time for rest, replenishment, and reconnection.

  • Weekend Retreat is appropriate for women of all ages, colors, backgrounds, disciplines, gender identities, and expressions. Please keep in mind that a mixed-gender gathering is on the horizon (TBD). Let us know if you’d like to be kept in that loop.

  • The Annual Course  must be completed prior to participating in a Weekend Retreat. The course establishes a foundation-level understanding of traditional ACT teachings and methods. It also provides a shared language (e.g., chessboard, self-as-context). The Retreat is an opportunity to explore these concepts together in person. The topics are pre-planned, however, their teachings are provided extemporaneously (in response to what is arising within the group at that moment). Retreats aim to bring concepts into experience (and, for that reason, include the experiential exercise that cannot be taught online).

  • This event is suitable to any level of mastery –from the beginner to the seasoned ACT therapist. Everyone is welcome. Advanced practitioners are encouraged to ask any questions that may arise — it can only bring greater depth and vitality to our conversation.

Participation

Sleepover for the weekend.
Or, if you prefer, feel free to commute.

Teaching periods are interspersed throughout the weekend. Each has a distinct topic (e.g., willingness). Whereas the topics are pre-determined, their teachings are delivered extemporaneously based on what is arising within the group at that moment. You might experience traditional ACT teachings, experiential exercises, brief guided meditation, written exercises, breakout groups, open discussion, and spontaneous one-on-one coaching. Nighttime activities are optional (e.g., bonfire).

  • Thursday is intentionally spacious (allowing for flight delays, traffic). Arrive between 2 - 4p. Refreshments at 4p. Welcome Session at 4:30p. Dinner is served at 6p. // Teaching sessions are on Friday and Saturday amidst plenty of free time. // Our Closing Session is from 10a-12:30p on Sunday. Followed by 12:30p brunch. Depart between 12:30 - 2p.  (Taking an eastbound flight? Feel free to leave at/after 10. Be sure to say goodbye to everyone on Sunday morning.)

  • Commuters are welcome to all activities and meals. At the minimum, plan to be on the property from 10a – 7p Friday and Saturday, and 9:30a – 12:30p Sunday. (There is a welcome session from 4-6p on Thursday. Ideally, you’d attend that as well.) These pared-down time frames ensure that you are part of each gathering. They omit breakfast and evening activities.

  • Our small hobby farm has a relaxed, down-to-earth, and harmonious vibe. By day, you can expect to be greeted by two cats, a dozen hummingbirds, and our friendly flock of chickens. After sunset, birdsong is replaced by that of our five resident barn owls-- and one very loud frog. If you’re a sensitive sleeper, please bring earplugs.

  • Weekend Retreat takes place at Pastime Farm — a private property in the San Francisco Bay Area. The address will be provided upon confirmation of your registration. Until then, aim your travel plans toward Sunol, California.

  • Accessing the house, cottage and cabins requires walking over relatively flat ground covered by bark mulch, as well as climbing stairs. The property offers many places to rest, including picnic tables, benches, and Adirondack chairs. Accessing these areas requires walking over uneven terrain, climbing stone steps, and remaining alert for holes created by our chickens. Please reach out with any questions.

  • Chef-crafted vegetarian meals will be provided. Options will be available for those with pre-reported food allergies and/or sensitivities. Tea and coffee will be available throughout the day.

Accommodations

If you choose to stay in one of the rooms on the property, you can request a single- or double-occupancy room, with a private (attached) or a shared (separate) bathroom. Visit this Lodging page on the Pastime Farm website for detailed descriptions and photographs of all retreat accommodations.

  • Three rooms within the main house are available during group retreats only: Fig Room, Sun Room, and Office. The Fig Room is located upstairs and has two beds (Queen, Twin Daybed). The Sun Room is located downstairs and has a twin daybed. Both of these rooms share a bathroom located downstairs (near the laundry room). The Office has a trundle bed, a private half bath, and is located downstairs.

  • Two cabins are located near the main house—each with a custom, built-in, adult bunkbed (Queen on bottom, Twin XL on top). The detached bathroom is shared with another cabin. Palm cabin has a cozy feeling with greater privacy (smaller windows set high). Olive cabin has a more light-filled feeling (large window, higher ceiling).

  • The 700-square-foot cottage is located near the garden, fire pit, and chicken coop. It is split into 2 adjoining spaces (each with a Queen bed and private bath) separated by a locked door. This is the only lodging on the property with private bathrooms. Oak has a large window looking onto the garden. Sequoia has a small kitchenette.

  • Depending on the season, you can choose to bring your own camping equipment. In that case, you’ll be responsible for set-up and clean-up. There is an area in the back yard near the olives trees and dance floor (perfect for your tent). Near the main house, you’ll have access to the “outhouse” (flushing toilet), and an outdoor shower (with hot & cold water).

  • There is a space for van hook-up (electricity, water). While you are welcome to dump greywater (from sinks) please be certain to not dump wastewater (toilet). Near the main house, you’ll have access to the “outhouse” (flushing toilet), and an outdoor shower (with hot & cold water).

Weekend Retreat Agreements

Agreements are necessary to create the holding space for this work. Before registering, please review each of the policies below.

  • Kelly is severely allergic to synthetic fragrance and, if exposed, will immediately experience anaphylaxis. Before applying for retreat, determine the amount of effort required for you to arrive and stay fragrance-free by checking the ingredients in your hair, body, and laundry products. (If the word “fragrance” or “parfum” is listed in their ingredients, then it will be a problem.) By registering, you are agreeing to forego fragrance entirely, not bring residue on your belongings, and not bring any items containing “fragrance” or “parfum” onto the property. If you arrive with fragrance, you will be asked to leave immediately -- without refund.

  • Whether you're traveling from out of town or participating as a commuter, please honor the requested arrival and departure times. Attend all Teaching Periods. See “Agenda” under the Participation section (above).

  • Each member of this group is entitled to confidentiality. This is a shared responsibility. By registering, you agree to protect the identities of everyone in attendance. Do not disclose any information about participants to outsiders. This includes their identities as well as anything they might have shared at any time within the gathering.

  • There is no way to prevent potential conflict of interest when gathering a group for the first time. If you arrive, and discover a conflict of interest with another participant, then please take care of yourself. Let the retreat manager know the situation. She will inform Kelly; From there, you can consider alternatives.

  • Due to high fire hazards, there is no smoking, incense, candles, or open flame of any sort to be used on the property — except in the designated area. If you wish to access the area, then ask Kelly.

  • We do not allow marijuana or illegal drugs on the property. Please do not bring or use them on the property (e.g., micro-dosing, psychedelics).

  • Quiet hours are from 10 p.m. - 8 a.m.

Weekend Retreat Policies  

Arrivals: Thursday, 2 p.m. - 4 p.m.
Departures: Sunday, 12:30* p.m.- 2 p.m.
Location: Pastime Farm - Sunol, CA
*Eastbound flights: Feel free to leave after 10 a.m.

Retreat Fee:  $2,200
Scholarships available.
There are no dates currently set for 2025.

The Retreat Fee covers our time together, activities, and meals provided by a personal chef. If you’re sleeping on the property, then there’s an additional Lodging Fee. If you’re participating as a commuter, then there are no additional fees.

  • If you’re sleeping on the property, then there’s an additional lodging fee that ranges from $50 (van hook-up) to $450 (private studio with kitchen) for the weekend (whether 2 or 3 nights). Options include van hook-up, private room, shared room, private bath, shared bath, and private studio with kitchen. Depending upon the season, camping may be available.

  • A $300 fee reduction is available to qualifying school teachers, active/inactive military, mental health workers (e.g., social workers, psychiatric aides and technicians), and mental health trainees (e.g., clinical interns, medical residents, postdoctoral fellows) if they would not otherwise be able to afford this event. If this applies to you, then please let me know.

  • Because space is limited, the cost of registration is nonrefundable regardless of attendance. Registration will not be pro-rated based on choice to exit early (including if you arrive with fragrance and are asked to leave).

  • Kelly is severely allergic to synthetic fragrance and, if exposed, will immediately experience anaphylaxis. Before applying for retreat, determine the amount of effort required for you to arrive and stay fragrance-free by checking the ingredients in your hair, body, and laundry products. (If the word “fragrance” or “parfum” is listed in their ingredients, then it will be a problem.) By registering, you are agreeing to forego fragrance entirely, not bring residue on your belongings, and not bring any items containing “fragrance” or “parfum” onto the property.

Register Here

  • Before continuing, review the agreements and policies listed above. Be especially certain to understand what is required to meet the fragrance-free policy. (If you arrive with fragrance, you will be asked to leave.)

  • Click here to complete the Questionnaire.

  • Click here to sign the Liability Waiver.

  • Click here to complete the Lodging Request.

  • Kelly will respond to you by email after receiving your submissions (Steps 1, 2, & 3 above) letting you know how to complete your registration. If you plan to sleep on the property, then she will let you know what lodging is available.

  • Follow the links provided in the email to make payment: for the retreat itself (Step 4) and for your lodging assignment (Step 5, if applicable). At that point, you're officially registered!

  • Check your inbox for an automatic confirmation email providing access to our Weekend Retreat Resources page. This is where you’ll find everything necessary for our time together (e.g., address, agenda). If you can’t find it, then check your junk folder for an email from Acuityscheduing.com.

Gloria Steinem on Women’s Groups:

"Groups run by and for women are our psychic turf; our place to discover who we are, or who we could become, as whole independent human beings. Somewhere in our lives, each of us needs a free place, a little psychic territory. Do you have yours?"